You know you’re on the H&C line when…

1. You can smugly stare across at the Central line trains at Mile End that lack the air conditioning that you do vitally need in order to survive the Tube.


2. The lack of any division between carriages means that escaping crazy people/drunks/anyone you just happened to want to avoid is damn near impossible without an invisibility cloak.


3. The fold down seats require your entire body weight to get them down in order to sit on it, and you still need some sort of counterbalance to keep it there so you can turn around to actually sit down.


4. Whitechapel is a tiny pocket of signal and 3G in an otherwise long run of stations with limited/no service.


5. The risk of getting on a Metropolitan line train or a Circle line by mistake when running in order not to miss your ticket home, and only realising around the Aldgate area, is very high.


6. In the daytime, with no existing geographical knowledge, you can tell which university is nearest to that station (QM Mile End, QM Barts, London Metropolitan and UEL) just by who gets on and off the train. And what books they are carrying.


7. Liverpool Street at rush hour resembles a coin pusher machine at a seaside arcade, and it would only take one person falling down the stairs to push a whole row forcefully unto the Met line that has just arrived.


8. With one line for Liverpool Street, Moorgate, Farringdon and Kings Cross, there is always at least one suitcase awkwardly placed by someone with holiday ambitions and no spatial relations.


9. Standing in that part between carriages only ever ends with your skirt caught in the folds of the train or shoes being scuffed by its moving parts.


10. If there are any closures on the tube that weekend, they are naturally on this line. It has been from the beginning and will be to the end of time.


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