Dress Distinctions

‘For this ball you look nice and then for this ball, you look hot.’ That’s what I was bluntly informed this week amongst the latest excitement for our final two college events of the year (cue: sobbing). As this week’s column comes to you from the beach in sunny Queensland, I have been left in utter confusion and complete despair at the thought of choosing two more dresses, for two more events, which are spaced only two days apart.

So, what constitutes a ‘nice’ dress and what constitutes a ‘hot’ dress? I guess the obvious distinction comes down to height and skin on show – not really things I usually worry about, because short dresses are really the only dresses in my life (too small for a maxi dress, too small for a midi…etc)

The idea of a so-called ‘hot dress’ also makes me think of that moment when you’re shopping, and you FINALLY find that perfect dress (or so you think) until you realise it is ruined with random cut-outs all over…seriously, what were designers thinking when they decided to cut out holes over the belly button or around the waist?! Not that some people don’t look absolutely HOT when wearing these, but they just aren’t for me.

And ‘nice dresses’, what exactly are you?! Are we talking bright, floral, long, short, tight, flowy – I could  go on. The only adjective to describe the dress I was actually planning on wearing for one of the balls next week only fits the above description of ‘tight’, so maybe it’s not much of an option anymore… Melbourne is also once again annoying us all by offering the sunniest days, and then nose -diving straight back to grey and gloomy (aka typical London weather) days of winter, so who even knows what the appropriate colour scheme is at the moment.

Let me just add here, that the dress I eventually decide to wear next week (will it be hot or nice, stay tuned) will be teamed with my delightfully quaint and yet horrendously long black gown. While this will undoubtedly make my facebook study abroad album of pictures look 100% x more civilised as opposed to sloppy and silly, this definitely adds to the dress difficulty which already exists. I don’t think there will be another time in my life where I’ll have to worry about choosing a dress which won’t look too ridiculous with a gown. It almost sounds like a ‘never have I ever’ question in the all too familiar drinking game…

So while I sit here writing this in the sunshine, wearing my big floppy hat – see last week’s column for the hat dilemma which was successfully solved, the only thing which makes the big dress debate more satisfying is knowing that both the dress and the gown will hopefully be accompanied with a nice, dark tan. And if that’s not a bonus, I’m not quite sure what is.

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