Why I’m Swiping Left on Tinder

It’s easy to guess what my friends recommended to me upon becoming single again: Tinder. So far, I’ve resisted.

In my opinion, apps like Tinder are slowly dissolving humankind’s ability to approach people, because we don’t have to charm anyone in public anymore. All it takes to arrange a date is a ‘Yes’ if you think someone’s photo is hot. Then you just start messaging.

I don’t mind that using the app means we’re being judged by our looks, because that’s what we do in real life anyway. I just think that actually walking up to someone and starting a conversation is much more exciting than a modernised version of MSN.

Don’t get me wrong, I know someone who’s found the man of their dreams through Tinder; but managing to secure a relationship through the app does seem to be a rarity. This is especially due to Tinder being a great way to find casual sex nearby.

An even faster way to find people close by is through Happn – and so far I hear the app is pretty successful. It picks up on anyone else with the app within a 250m radius and pops up with their photo. If you fancy them, you can start talking to them. The whole idea revolves around being able to talk to the fit girl that just walked past, without having to actually talk to them.

Call me old-fashioned, but I’d much rather someone actually come up and say hi if they fancy a chat. Approaching people myself, despite the fear of rejection, is far more exhilarating than an online flirting session.

I’ve been wondering what the next app hit is going to be. As well as Tinder and Happn you can download Grindr for finding “local gay, bi and curious guys.” I read Polly Vernon’s article Gindr: a new sexual revolution? on The Observer online and she mentions how these apps are sociable and liberating, and I understand why. The maker of Grindr, Joel Simkhai, for instance, hoped that the app would “help the process of gay men coming out” and I do believe it has.

However, Tinder, Happn and Grindr are all said to contribute towards an era of polyamory. I’d hasten to guess that a lot of people using these apps are already in relationships, but continue to talk online to others because it’s just so easy. If you’re into polyamory then fair enough, but when it becomes cheating then that’s a different story.

Although there are obviously both positive and negative aspects to apps like these, I’d still prefer the personal touch. Until my wit and charm fail me or lagging behind the technological advances of the world becomes too much, I won’t be signing up just yet.

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