The Myth of The Well-Wisher


A well-wisher is defined as ‘a person who desires happiness or success for another, or who expresses such a desire’ (oxford dictionaries) – which is probably one of the most encouraging definitions of a word that I have ever read, especially because it seems so rare to meet such a person.

The want for another person to succeed in achieving their goal – be it an aim to pass an extremely difficult exam with top marks, or handle difficult situations at university or school, is hard to think about. This concept demands a person’s undivided attention – moreover, compassion, faith and confidence is needed.

You may ask yourself ‘do I have a well-wisher?’ and, by default, immediately think of those who you are close to – your parents, cousins, old friends. Even your doctor may seem to be your well-wisher. But, this is not always the case. Your family, friends and work colleagues are lovely people who encourage and support you – but it does not mean that they are necessarily your well-wishers.

This is not to make you think differently of your close friends and family – nor is it intended to suggest that they don’t wish you well, because they most likely do. But, it is interesting to see that, for some, those who are supposed to wish you the very best in achieving your aims don’t. And those who you least expect to wish you the success, like your work colleagues or acquaintances, do. Not every single person around you is your well-wisher. They are rare, and it is extremely hard to determine if someone is your well-wisher or not.

Be it your manager at work, or your lecturer at university, your superior will directly challenge you. An example can be where he/she decides to give you a really heavy workload – despite the fact that you have communicated countless times that it is getting too much for you, but to no avail. They are insistent that you complete the set tasks.

Harpreet Pal

Harpreet Pal

They are leaving you to drown in the ocean, in the middle of nowhere, holding on to Jack and waiting to be rescued with nothing but a wooden door to keep you afloat.

But. If you really think about it, we have the tools to deal with the task in hand. We find ourselves struggling when we are faced with difficulty – struggle is, inevitably, part of life. You hate every second of the process, but, you find yourself not only learning more about the task in hand, but also developing the key skills you need to progress further. Remember, Rose lives to tell the tale!

It’s important to recognise that in life we will all work hard to get what we want in order to do well. If you don’t see yourself as someone who is hard working, you may feel undecided about what you want right now. If this is the case, it is perfectly fine. It is true that, when you recognise your personal goals, you will want to achieve them, and more, in order to be the best version of yourself that you can possibly be.

Fear not! You know yourself more than anyone else, and in difficult times, the people who desire to be surrounded by their well-wishers can’t always recognise them. You may not know about it, but they still exist, and continue to support you in many ways. Well-wishers are rare, because people decide who they want to support and encourage – ourselves included. First and foremost, it is always important to remember that you are your own well-wisher.

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