Sex is an amazing thing, it is an experience between two (or more) individuals which provides comfort, pleasure and pure ecstasy. However, with sex comes those awkward moments that we all pretend never happened. The funny thing is, these ‘awkward’ moments are experienced by everyone at least once and shouldn’t be hidden in a sock drawer. From cramps during sex to partners not lasting ‘long’ enough, we’ve all been there. Thankfully, there are places online or material much like this article that provide people with safety of mind that these moments are normal. Sex can get weird, awkward and things just happen sometimes, but it is important to always remember that everything you experience in a sexual encounter has been experienced by many others before you and will happen to many after you.
One of the most common awkward moments that occur during sex which effects women the most is cramps. Cramping up half way through a romantic experience can be the biggest mood killer, plus its not the easiest thing to ignore! Once your leg cramps that’s it, game over. Then once the cramp is gone, the mood drops and you both look at each other like ‘oh well that’s over then’. However, this is normal, it happens because your body is tensed up throughout sex and once you relax slightly a cramp can occur or it can happen due to low sugar or energy levels… which is fun for us girls who have problems with our blood sugar. Another physical awkward moment which cannot be helped is jaw lock, this occurs when giving oral pleasure to someone. This, again, is normal. However, once again, it can really ruin a moment if you’re sitting in front of your partner trying to unlock your jaw looking like a hand puppet.
Men especially find their first time awkward, they have a lot of pressure put on themselves to provide, which makes the next awkward moment really damaging to a man’s self-esteem. The fear of not lasting ‘long’ enough and feeling humiliated has been presented in mass media for generations and it can be awkward if your partner mentions it. However, it is normal and common which is why it is presented in films as a comedic element as many men can relate. The best advice I could offer is not to the individual who finishes early but to their partner, do not make a big deal out of it. It happens. By making a big deal you can really hurt the person you love. Then there’s the opposite, when they last too long and the mood drops. Once again, this cannot be helped, and you should take into consideration your partners feelings before complaining.
Then we have the socially awkward moments; people walking in and undressing in front of your partner. Now, being walked in on by a friend is bad enough but a parent is another level of awkwardness and shame. It is a huge mood killer and will probably lead to no eye contact with your mother or father for at least a week…. However, once again, it happens to the best of us. Now undressing in front of a partner for the first time, yet again, can be awkward due to insecurities but always remember, if they want to have sex then they must find you physically attractive, that human psychology. Its just a body. We all have one in many shapes and sizes.
Yes, these moments happen alongside many others, but remember we are all humans and sex is completely normal… including in the awkward moments.
- I use the word ‘partner’ throughout rather than limiting labels such as boyfriend or girlfriend to show that I acknowledge all sexual orientations and those individuals who do not identify with any one label, but prefer to identify with a fluid sexual orientation instead.